I think honest communication, no matter where it comes from, is positive for a relationship.
When I was about 12 years old back in Houston, my Dad used to take us to the driving range.
Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty... mine's putting in an express lane.
There were years when I was a beer and tequila guy, then I got real fat. And then I found that you could actually go on a diet and drink scotch. Then I got hooked on scotch, and if you get hooked on scotch, then everything else just tastes wrong.
I begged the universe to make me a famous comedian, and it did. So I tend not to ask for any more.
I don't like to do material people have heard. Now, they like to hear material that they know, because that's the stuff that made me famous, and, unfortunately, I don't do a ton of it.
If you become famous and don't have a live show to back it up, they're not going to pay you any money.
Vegas is famous for a lot of things, and bad marriages are one of them. Margo and I are proof that you can make this work. It just takes a little effort.
I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
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