Andy Rooney Quotes

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The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

Tags: | Andy Rooney,Wrong,Something,Right,

One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don't clean it up too quickly.

Tags: | Andy Rooney,Day,World,Living,

Computers may save time but they sure waste a lot of paper. About 98 percent of everything printed out by a computer is garbage that no one ever reads.

Tags: | Andy Rooney,Time,Paper,Garbage,

Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.

Tags: | Andy Rooney,Done,Need,Easier,

I don't like food that's too carefully arranged: it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting.

Tags: | Andy Rooney,Time,Chef,Cooking,

Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens.

Tags: | Andy Rooney,Life,You,Happens,

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

Tags: | Andy Rooney,Dog,Person,Average,

The federal government has sponsored research that has produced a tomato that is perfect in every respect, except that you can't eat it. We should make every effort to make sure this disease, often referred to as 'progress', doesn't spread.

Tags: | Andy Rooney,Government,Progress,Effort,

The closing of a door can bring blessed privacy and comfort - the opening, terror. Conversely, the closing of a door can be a sad and final thing - the opening a wonderfully joyous moment.

Tags: | Andy Rooney,Blessed,Door,Moment,

Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney of 60 Minutes Dies
Andy Rooney Through The Years Video - ABC News
CBS commentator Andy Rooney dies at 92 - CNN.com
Andy Rooney on Sleeping - YouTube

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